The Marauder's Big List of Stuff
by quillpen7495
Summary: Kind of a companion piece to The Top Ten. The Marauder's have their own set of lists. Oneshot.


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READ THIS!! The format of this story is a little bit hard to read, so it's like this; Lily and James find the list, and than there's an explanation of how the list came to be. Than, the lists. The same repeats for Sixth-Seventh Year.

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter

The Marauders' Big List of Stuff

--

"I found more lists James!" Lily showed her husband the paper she was holding.

"Ohh… no." James tried to get it from her. "That one's really embarrassing."

"Oooooh!" Lily clapped her hands happily. "Let's read it!"

Grumbling to himself, James sat down, and prepared himself to be brutally mortified.

First Year-Fourth Year

In the dark gloom of twilight, three figures were creeping towards a wall on the seventh floor. The velvety darkness enveloping him, one of the shadows stealthily tiptoed forward and paced three times in front of it. As a door appeared, the three slipped in.

"OWWWWW!! Remus you stepped on my toe!!" Sirius began hopping on one foot as the door to the Room of Requirements closed behind him.

"Merlin Sirius, you always ruin our spy routine." James said, collapsing into a nearby chair, laughing as Sirius tripped over his own foot.

"What are we here for again?" Remus said, deftly avoiding the foot Sirius stuck out.

"I've decided that since I make lists, the Marauders should too!" James happily drew out three sugar quills and a seemingly never-ending scroll of paper.

"I'm game." Sirius had finally sat down. "How about you Remypoo?!"

"Please refrain from calling me that, and yes, I am fine with it." Remus brought out a box of Bertie Botts Every Flavor Beans. "What should we call it?"

"Sirius and James and Remus's List of Incredibly Awesome Things that Are Good to Eat!" Sirius said gleefully, dumping the jelly beans onto the table. "SJRLIATTAGTE!!"

"Padfoot, that's a horrible title!" James whacked him upside the head with the parchment. "Plus, even if we used it, I would come first, because I came up with the idea!"

"Well I'm the best looking!" Sirius flipped his hair.

"Sirius?" James stared at him as if he had just had an epiphany.

"What!" Sirius looked at his nails.

"You are a poof." And with that said, James turned his attention back to the subject at hand; the list. "It'll be called the Marauders' Big List of Stuff" He said decisively, writing the title at the top of the parchment in big flowing letters.

Sirius pointed at the parchment. "Ha!! Now who's the poof!"

"Still you."

"Poo."

"Section One: epiphany's received during Hogwarts." Remus titled the first column.

"Section Two: Good things to eat!!" Sirius said happily, scribbling down the words across the top of the second column.

If you all get to name a column, I do too!" James wrote in flourishing letters across the top of the third (and last) column… Reasons Why Sirius is a Poofter.

"ARRRGGGHHHH!! PRONGS!!"

--

The First Year-Fourth Year Lists

Epiphany's Received During Hogwarts:

-Sirius is a poof _"Am not!" "Are too!" "No!" "Yes!" "No!" Yes!" No"! "Yes!" "No!" No!" "Yes!" "Haha! Tricked you!"_

-James is infatuated with Lily Evans

-Professor Mcgonagall is madly in love with Professor Dumbledore _"How do you figure that Sirius?" "She gave him a Valentine!!" "Sirius, that was one she confiscated. It squirted Bubotuber pus all over his lemon drops." "So?"_

-Professor Flitwick can fly _"What?" "You see Remus, it all fits. He's the charms teacher, he looks like a feather; even his name! FLITwick!" "James?" Yes Remy?" "Have you ever thought about visiting St. Mungos' psychiatric ward?"_

- Hogwarts has a brain, and it uses it to play horrid tricks on it's students, dangling enchanted mistletoe over Lily and Sirius. Lily should've been kissing me!! _"James?" "Yeah?" "Breathe." "Excuse me, I need to go kill Sirius again."_

- The Shrieking Shack really is haunted. _"Um, guys?" "Yeah?" "About that…"_

Good Things to Eat:

Chocolate

Pumpkin Juice

Butterbeer

Bertie Botts Every Flavor Beans

Muffins

"_Sirius, you're the only one who uses this list, you know that, right?" "yup." Ok… moving on."_

Reasons Sirius is a Poofter…

-He flips his hair

-He wears pink bunny slippers _"I'll have you know that those are very fashionable in Italy! I saw it in a magazine!" "Sirius, that was children's clothing." "Oh."_

-He writes shopping lists, example above.

-He has really long eyelashes

-He wears tight pants "_Those are my Quidditch pants!" "Padfoot, you don't do Quidditch." "So?"_

--

Sixth- Seventh Year

--

"Sirius!" James called. "Oh Siiiiriius!"

"Mmmmphhhghhhh!" James found Sirius upside down in his trunk, struggling with a very long piece of paper.

"Huh?" James tugged on Sirius's legs, as he came out with a pop.

"Remember this?" Sirius held up the list. We forgot to do it fifth year, because of all that Animagi stuff. We should start it again!"

"We have to go find Moony first." James picked up the roll of parchment and ran down the stairs to the common room. "I bet he's in the library!"

On the way, he ran into Lily, who he hadn't seen since last year.

"Sorry Lily… I was in a hurry." James said contritely, pushing hair out of his eyes.

"It's fine James, but watch where you're going next time." She said with a smile. She departed, leaving James gazing after her with a, for lack of better word, goofy grin on his face.

"Padfoot!" He said ecstatically, as they began their search for Remus. "She smiled at me!''

"Yeah, yeah, come on lover-boy." Sirius said, dragging him through the corridors to the library.

--

Three Hours later…

"Moony! Where have you been!" Sirius said, jumping up from his seat in the library. "We looked everywhere for you!"

Remus looked strangely at him.

"I've been at lunch, and than the Gryffindor Common Room, like normal people. I thought that you two had reputations to keep, and couldn't set foot in the library?"

"But it was important! Look what we found!" James proudly displayed the scroll of paper, inkblots and all. "Our list!"

Remus looked at the bottom of the page. "I don't remember us having those columns." He said, pointing.

"Oh, Sirius and I came up with three new ones for the next 2 years." James said proudly.

"Reasons I love Lily? Most awesome people in the school? WHY REMUS NEEDS TO GET A LIFE?" Remus looked at the two, who cowered under his glare.

"Ok, maybe we could fix that last one…"

Sixth and Seventh Year Lists

Reasons I love Lily: by James Potter, because Moony and Padfoot won't help.

-She has pretty hair. It's shiny. _"I really need to ask her what conditioner she uses…" "Padfoot!" "What?"_

-She has gorgeous eyes… all big… and green… _"James, you're drooling."_

-She has a pretty smile._ "Too bad she never smiles at you." "Shut up Sirius!"_

-She has really long legs…

-She's the most talented witch in our school

-She's a very good snog _"Oi, Sirius! That's my future wife you're talking about! And I though that you said that you weren't doing this list??"_

Most Awesome People in the School:

Me! (Sirius)

James… I guess. Unless he's mooning after Lily. Than he's useless. _"Hey!"_

Moony!!

Lily

Peter (I guess)

Frank

Dumbledore

Flitwick… he can fly! _"James!" "What! He can!"_

Alice, she helped me plan my first date with Lily! _"James; obsessed much?"_

Hagrid! He's got cool animals!

Reasons Why the Marauders will always be friends… "_Sirius, this is cheesy. Masculine guys aren't supposed to do sentimental." "Lily likes it…" "On with the list!"_

We're loyal: it's all for one, and one for all… even Peter.

We know each other… maybe too well.

We've got the Marauder pact, and anyone who breaks it will break out in horrible boils.

We've been together through thick and through thin; even through Sirius's poof stage!

We're fighting against the same things; like Voldemort

We need each other for our pranks!

We care about each other. _"Sirius, you jump on my bed at 3:00 in the morning singing the Barney theme song." "yeah!"_

--

Lily looked at James, who looked a little bit apprehensive, and also a bit like he was going to puke. He opened his mouth to speak, when all of a sudden, all he could see was Lily's hair.

"That was so sweet!" She sobbed into his shirt. "I didn't know you could be so sentimental!"

James rubbed her back, a bit confused about why she was crying, but happy that she was happy about his sentimentalism.

"Wait, James?" Lily looked up, drying her eyes on his shirt.

"Hmmmm?" He buried his nose in the crook of her neck.

"Is Sirius really gay?"

--

Hope you enjoyed it! Pleeeeaaaaase review! I crave feedback, even if it's bad; although hopefully it's good.

Thanks for reading!

quillpen7495


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